Personal ..

7. července 2010 v 23:02 | Webmiss |  theTHOUGHTS
When I was thinking about founding this blog, I said I didn't want to write about personal stuff, I didn't want to write about my life - and I actually had no reason writing about it, because I was happy, I was glad that I had nothing bad to write about. But now I feel like writing this down, because it is some kind of therapy, like when someone has a diary - my blogs were always like a diary to me. Well, what I want to talk about is my relationship with my boyfriend (how unexpected for those who used to visit my 1st blog). As some of you may know, I was really happy to find this boy, I even ended my relationship with my ex-boyfriend because of him. I won't say it was love at first sight, but it was - actually, I think it still is - love. Not from the first day, but still .. the first 4 months of our relationship were beautiful, and a couple of weeks ago, I had my first time with him and everything was just perfect. But the last month was just awful - and he started acting like my friends who know him for a long time told me he would. I am not talking about the bad stuff he does, which for example my best friend thinks it's horrible. I am still not sure if I should even mention this, but - this is my blog and not many people know me personally - and those who do, well, what the hell, then they should know it. He did this and the first time people started asking questions I realized it wasn't quite okay. Because of him, my body was often covered with bruises, because he thought it was okay to be rude to me, because he thought it was okay to bite me (not in the lovely way). But I never payed too much attention to this, I never really cared.  I always acted in front of everyone that it was okay, I tried to, but inside I guess I always knew that something wasn't okay. And another thing that bothers me - he thinks I belong to him. He does not understand, that even though I am faithful and all, I need to have other people in my life. When I talk to a guy - a friend of ours - he starts being jealouse. Very, very jealouse and I just can't take it anymore. It botheres me how rude he can get sometimes. And in the end, when we have a discussion, he says that I make him the bad one and all that stuff. And at this point, after talking to a couple of my friends aboáut it, I don't think I wanna do this anymore, I don't think I am able to do this anymore. We'll see how this ends - and when it ends.


1 n i k a. n i k a. | 7. července 2010 v 23:18 | Reagovat

i know i may seem like a stalker but i just love reading all your blogs...

ehm what :O bruises?
i... hope it is going to be allright everything. i dont know how, but somehow it must work and im hoping in a happyend for you ♥

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